Always
by Leather and Stripes
Summary: 'Armin stops, his throat tight from crying and words that have been burning a hole in his heart for years.' Part of an Eremin collaboration with tumblr user sennfan.


AN: Hello all! This was _probably_ not the update you were wanting, but it's something that I (Stripes) wrote as part of a colab with my friend (known as sennfan on tumblr). She did an amazing comic, and I wrote a fic to go along with it!

Yay for eremin!

This is all angst and fluff. The prompt: Eren is falling deeper and deeper into loosing himself in Titan form and after many more severe injuries, Armin reaches a breaking point and has a quiet, personal moment near the beside of an unconscious Eren to say something he's meant to say for years.

(We are working on the next chapter on Punch Drunk Love, as well as the second half of Domesticated Dead. Both should be posted fairly soon, but Leather has been dealing with some major family emergency issues and writing has had to be pushed aside for a while. But we're working on it, we're in good spirits, and hope to have some more stuff for you soon. As well as a few SNK/Attack on Titan fics that we've been working on, both together and apart).

Please go visit sennfan on tumblr to check out the comic! It's LOVELY.

Cheers!

Stripes

* * *

**.:Always:.**

**xxx**

He waits until the room is empty, after the steady influx of people had finally stopped for the night.

The room is too quiet. Armin's heartbeat thuds heavily against his ribcage and he's sure it's loud enough to wake Eren. Everything about him seems too loud: his footsteps, his breath, his heart hammering in his chest. His shoes scuff against the stone floor as he sits in the worn wood chair at Eren's bedside. Eren is supposed to be the one making noise, voice cutting through the silence, his laugh reverberating through Armin's chest and making his heartbeat erratic. Instead he is quiet and still and an ache slices through Armin like a knife, flaying him open.

Seeing Eren bandaged and unconscious in bed is enough to cause bile to rise in his throat because he's been here before, he's _seen_ this before, and he's not sure how many times he'll be able to before it shatters everything he has left.

His eyes sting with tears he won't let fall. "Eren…" Armin's fingers skim over the back of his hand, a gesture he's repeated so many times that it's nothing if not second nature. "This…Eren, you can't keep going on like this. It gets harder every time for you to come back to us." He swallows thickly around the lump in his throat, "To…me."

Eren's skin is warm against his, and Armin grips his hand tighter to stop his own from shaking. "I lost you once, and…and I did nothing! I felt…so powerless. You slipped from this world right before my eyes. A-and…and it was to save _me_. I-I couldn't imagine life without you. I…I can't even…" He's stopped trying to hold back his tears and instead watches them fall to the crisp, white sheets, beading on the surface before sinking into the fabric. "I was ready to die," he murmurs into the quiet of the room, the weight of his words sinking in his stomach like a stone. "After...after I thought you…" Armin closes his eyes, teeth digging into his bottom lip. He can almost taste blood before he's brave enough to look at Eren again.

"I wasn't...strong enough. But…" the breath he takes is slow and steady and fills him with something other than dread pooling in his stomach, "things are different now. I'm not the same person. I'm stronger. You fought for me. You gave your life for me. And I have to keep fighting." Armin concentrates on the steady rise and fall of Eren's chest, grounding him in his determination, "You can't be the only one who's strong, Eren. And…I will do everything in my power to protect you. Because I never even got a chance to tell you that..."

He stops, his throat tight from crying and words that have been burning a hole in his heart for years.

"I love you." The words come easier than he ever thought they could, and something lightens in his chest. Armin leans in, warm breath brushing over Eren's forehead, lips hovering just above his tanned skin. "I love you, Eren."

"Armin…"

He pulls back immediately, a blush burning his cheeks, words jumbling in his mind before they can even reach his mouth, "E-Eren! I-I didn't…I didn't think…"

"Armin, I-I'm sorry…" Eren shifts against the bed, propping himself up on an elbow with a wince. Armin notices the tears in Eren's eyes and feels himself flush brighter, something twisting in his stomach.

"…You weren't supposed to…"

"Please…" he raises a hand to Armin's cheek, clumsily wiping away a tear with his thumb before running his fingers into his hair. "Please don't cry."

Eren's lips are chapped against his and Armin doesn't care. He lets Eren pull him closer, lips and fingers fumbling with inexperience, and he knows he's crying again. The grip on him tightens, and Armin is standing before he realizes it. Eren's lips press to the corner of his mouth, his cheeks, his jaw.

His knee sinks into the mattress, fingers reaching up to brush sweaty strands of hair from Eren's forehead. "I can't lose you," Armin's voice waivers, "not again."

The little smile that spreads across Eren's face makes Armin's heart beat heavily in his ears. "You won't," he says like a promise, leaning up just enough to catch Armin's lips with his own. It's tender and slow, and as much as Armin's mind is saying that Eren can't promise that, that nothing is for certain, he can't help but believe him with everything that he is.

"H-how...how long have you...?" Eren's breath against his neck sends a little thrill down Armin's spine, tingling and filling him to the brim with bright white heat with each messy kiss Eren places along his jaw.

It's not something he can answer easily because he can't remember a time when we didn't love Eren. Because his smile made life worth living, and his laugh made anything possible. And his touch...

"Always," he breathes, pressing his forehead to Eren's. He's not sure who moves first, but with each kiss, Armin can feel the tension leave, mind shutting down in stages until all that's left is Eren, Eren.

Eren's mouth opens and the moment Armin feels his tongue skim his bottom lip, he gasps despite himself.

"Armin," he feels more than hears Eren whisper against his lips. Eren's fingers tense on his scalp and he catches the moan in his throat before it can escape. He presses forward, desperate for more of Eren, shivering when a hand settles at his waist.

Eren flinches under him, a small hiss of pain breaking the kiss. Armin draws back, breathing heavy and eyes wide. "I-I'm sorry!"

"No," Eren reaches out and tucks Armin's hair behind his ear with a little smile. "No, no definitely don't be."

"But…but you're-"

Eren's lopsided grin stops the words on his tongue, and Armin lets out a shaky laugh. He moves to the edge of the bed, laying gently against Eren's side. The smile crinkles the corners of Eren's eyes as he wraps an arm around Armin's shoulder and pulls him closer.

Armin shifts his head to rest against Eren's shoulder, a hand brushing over the bandages wrapped across his chest, and feels himself relax for the first time in what seems like forever.

**xxx**


End file.
